2011:Preparation :: Lakers: Repositioning
If I had to title 2011 it would be
The Year of Positioning and Preparation
Last years final blog entry I used a basketball analogy to convey my point. I had zero intentions on doing the same this year but hey it’s feeling good so I’m gonna flow with it,lol…
I'll make the comparison between
2011:: this years Lakers
Im not expecting a ‘ring’ at the end of 2012 but I am expecting to experience some significant amounts of growth for long term stability.
Mike Brown::Full time Actress
Mike brown has been a head coach before but it’s almost as if he’s a rookie coach now that he’s coaching the Lakers. It's as if he has a ‘substitute teacher vibe’ like he just doesn’t seem all the way capable but not quite a fish out of water either. Now this was my first full year of being a full time actress and child there were some days I’m sure I felt as Mike Brown did after that Xmas debut against the Bulls. I’ve bombed some days, I’ve gotten call backs and no bookings, I’ve felt like I was in over my head sometimes and then there were days where I noticed how much better I’m getting. There were some victories this year that felt like championships, TO ME. And that’s actually what I’ve learned, I need to focus on.. What are MY CHAMPIONSHIPS! If I don’t identify rite now what I place the most value on and what opportunities I need to immediately address.. I’ll allow those around me to determine my success. The lakers are not a championship team rite now but they have played better defense so far this year than I think they have in years. I could continue but I think you get my point (I'm Identifying my Victories)
Lamar Odom:: Relationship
I think I fell in love with seeing Lamar Odom in a Lakers jersey. He’s a good guy who was a great contribution to the lakers success, he didn’t have any drama with him. He was pretty consistent in his performance, loyal and likeable but he wasn’t the perfect fit. It hurt to walk away and no one really understands fully why it was so imperative for him to go and he will be missed but, big picture perspective he wouldn’t have made the next phase easier he would have made it harder. With that said, I’ll just say I love you E and I always will. (Somethings are good but God wants us seeking great)
Can you imagine going back to work the next day after finding out that your boss tried to get rid of you the day before but wasn’t able to? More importantly, you have to now be successful in that environment. Well, after years and years of feeling justified for the bitterness I felt towards my father not being in my life. I learned this past year that in order for me to be successful in life I had to operate from a place of forgiveness or everything I did would be limited. So whether my dad was rite or wrong or whether the trade made good business sense or not, forgiveness is imperative when seeking God’s fullness in your life. (Forgiving others is actually for urself)
Sometimes being good at something allows you to get in your own way. You expect others to have the foresight you have and understand your vision and if ‘they’ could just want to be the best than everything would be ok. I was good in the fashion industry, it just came naturally and knowing that I’ve celebrated those victories makes it so hard for me to experience the lows today. Even though I am capable of identifying how much better I’m becoming in what I love to do. Sometimes when your so good your so lonely and other times when your striving to be so good it’s still so lonely. Kobe is getting older and all I keep hearing is he only has a couple more years to play. Yet, when I watch his game all I see is a smarter more mature player. I’m able to see the rise as others are identifying his decline. Now yall know I have always been a Kobe fan but it’s always been because I see his work ethic in his game. I see how he loses and I see how he wins. I see how everything that I am today is because god is preparing me for where i need to be tomorrow. It's not on my time, it's on his.
I say all of this to say 2011 was a year of repositioning. God worked on ME.. He made me better through giving me less yet somehow I kept winding up with more. I moved, to down size but my place is bigger and cheaper. I had to get out of my car lease, but my car is better and less expensive. I left one of the biggest commercial agents in LA yet my new agency is smaller yet my auditions have quadrupled. It appeared as if he was giving me less but I was actually getting more! I’m learning to trust him! I’m learning to move when he says move, I’m learning to seek him and know that he will supply all of my needs, I’m learning that this road isn’t lonely, he's just making the necessary cuts and trades. This repositioning is necessary!
Wishing you all many miracles and blessings this coming year. Thank you all so much for your continued support of this blog and my career. This blog is truly therapeutic and I hope you know how much you truly mean to me
"The Proof is in the sacrifice"