"bookem fest" vs. "stalkem fest"

I’ve totally fallen off with my blogging. It’s been on my mind but , I have honestly been on a paper chase every time I touch the computer.  Anywhoo, this blog entry is both humbling and inspiring.

Everyone is aware that I am in pursuit of my dreams. FULL TIME, going hard, grinding, and really putting all my energy into where I want to ultimately be.

 Well last week was “bookem fest”, yes I made that up! What I mean is, I was submitting for jobs on my cell and laptop at the same time. I was on auditions submitting in the waiting room for other gigs, it was non stop. I would leave one and get info to head to another one. As a result, I worked nearly everyday last week. If I didn’t work I had at least 2 auditions that day.

This week. Instead of “bookem fest”, I’m in “stalkem fest” (I know corny but true) I am in day 4 and I have not had one audition and I can count on two lil mini hands how many gigs I have submitted for. The most productive thing I feel I’ve done all week is stalk casting directors on twitter, smh….

I say all of this to say. There are weeks, days, hours, phone calls, etc. that make me feel like I am the luckiest person alive to be pursuing my dreams. Than there are days that feel like months and I’m grabbing the bible seeking peace so I don’t loose faith in my pursuit.

I feel like I am far from a good friend, daughter, sister, aunt, god mommy, girlfriend some days because, It’s even too much for me to listen to others when I’m trying to remain uncloudy. I say this to say, I’m sorry. I really try to be present during our conversations but I haven’t mastered that part of my journey just yet. It’s so hard, to work so hard and feel like you have hit a brick wall. Thanks for putting up with me, thanks for supporting me, thanks for having a positive words when you hear my voice buckle (can your voice buckle?lol).  This part of the process is extremely hard for me. Not because I doubt for one second that I will be successful but, because I know how bad I want it and how hard I’ll work if I got it, BUT I’M THE ONLY ONE THAT KNOWS THAT,lmao…. 

                    “How do I make them find out?” (in my Mitchell voice,lls)

I was inspired to finally sit and write an entry because of this quote

“Whenever you see a successful person you only see the public glories, never the private sacrifices to reach them.”
                                                                      Greg Evans

With all of that being said. I will try to be a better Nikiva for all of you guys if you promise to, share my blog with 2 people today. There is strength in numbers. I realize blog spot is not the most user friendly blog site so I’m looking for a web person to edit my blog for me to make it a little easier.(do you know anyone?) Also, follow me on twitter: nikivadionne

You guys mean so much to me and I’m glad your apart of my grind. Thanks for being supportive

NO SUGAR: I know I have been funny acting lately but it's not intentional I am just extremely focused and antisocial because I'm constantly trying to figure out what angle is going to work for me. I'm sorry, I love u, get over it and spread the word about me ;-) thank u thank you thank you for understanding 

COMING SOON: *Short film with K. Ceakou
                                *Images from shoot with Slickforce and a special blog entry dedicated to  
                                  slickforce team
                                *Lloyd video- "Lay it Down"

“The proof is in the sacrifice”



  1. Keep it moving Cuz; just by you doing what you're doing; has inspired me to get back to the way I use to do things; full focus. I lost that a bit for about six months because of failed projects and having no patience, lol.

    Just remember the secret to this business, and it's really simple; but not so simple; ONE WORD: "Persevere"

  2. Thanks cuz... We have to meet up soon. There are somethings i want to tell you that may get you excited ;-)


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